Fickle or Faithful?

From the Merriam-Webster free online dictionary:

fickle - adjective - marked by lack of steadfastness, constancy or stability; given to erratic changeableness.

In yesterday's post, my blog parter Lindy described herself as "likely to change especially due to irresolution or instability." I take issue with that assertion. I have known the Unstoppable Mrs. Start for some time now, and there is nothing irresolute or unstable about her.

Granted, we must adapt to the rapidly changing world around us in order to survive. But that doesn't make us fickle. I like this definition from Wiktionary even better:

fickle - adjective - quick to change one's opinion or allegiance; insincere; not loyal or reliable.

That DEFINITELY doesn't describe most of the amazing women I know. As a matter of fact, I can think of countless times have I been loyal to a fault. Remained on a committee that I no longer felt passionate about because I feared conflict. Stayed beside a friend who did not nurture me - who in fact sucked the lifeblood out of me - because I didn't want to hurt her feelings. Stayed in a relationship that was unsatisfactory - or worse, abusive - because I feared being alone.

Life is short, my friends. We deserve better.

Every breath we take could be our last. Every moment matters. Yes, it's hard, but sometimes the greatest kindness we can show ourselves is to simply say the word "no."

It gets easier with practice.

I have learned that I CAN be replaced on a committee, that the old friends will make new friends, that my next great love might be waiting right around the corner. That doesn't make me fickle; that makes me constant - at least to myself. And that is true integrity.

From dictionary.com:

integrity - noun - the state of being whole, entire or undiminished

To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.
~ William Shakespeare, Hamlet

What do you think? Is being fickle a virtue or a vice? Have you ever been loyal to a fault?

Author: Pam Asberry
Website: http://pamasberry.blogspot.com
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Fickle. Why not?

Yep. You better believe it. I am fickle. I must be. Are you questioning why someone would categorize themselves as (adj.) likely to change especially due to irresolution or instability (Dictionary.com)?

Think about it:

• Our Nation had a budget surplus under President Clinton from 1998 through 2001. Holy hell, look at us now. It took an act of Congress to increase the debt ceiling.
• Following the September 11th attacks on our borders, President Bush launched the war on terror. US forces attacked Afghanistan on October 7, 2001 which will make it the longest fought war in America’s history.
• Gas prices were at a high, but reasonable, $2.60 per gallon before Katrina hit in 2005 then soared to $4.00 and have been low, then high, then low, then high…now, we just expect gas prices to be as erratic as the weather in Georgia and nothing short of ridiculous.

And this is the tiniest shard of ice from the tip of an ice cap that is melting in the Arctic. Folks, the world changes, the economy changes, and our circumstances change therefore we must change. We must go on living in a world filled with uncertainties. We must adapt to an economy that doesn’t support a person of simple means who wants only to drive a car to a job they are proud to have, feed and clothe his or her children and prayerfully keep a roof over their heads. We must deal with our emotions, put past failures to rest, and grow.

I realize the definition of fickle speaks more to one’s personality than his or her circumstances, but oft times our personality is shaped by our circumstances in how we respond to them.  Based on what we are dealing with in our world today I challenge you to be fickle. Don’t ebb and flow with the world’s tides; grow and change. Another word for fickle: diversification.

How are you fickle when facing today’s challenges? Have you ebbed and flowed or grown and changed?

Life in Penned Perspective by Lindy Chaffin Start

www.unstoppablestart.com