Tuesday, July 26, 2011

47 Things You Should Never Apologize For

Yes, that's me. In the porthole of a cruise ship. I make no apology for this.
Do you ever apologize for things that you shouldn’t? I have been known to apologize for: forgetting to put on my make-up; the condition of my thighs; wearing a dress my date didn't like; the weather; making mistakes in a piano performance; having fun when someone else wasn't.

Resolved: From this day forward, I apologize ONLY for the things I do wrong, NOT for being my imperfect, quirky, occasionally outrageous self. Here, in no particular order, is a list of 47 things YOU shouldn’t apologize for, either.
  1. Doing what makes you happy.
  2. Using big words.
  3. Using bad words (in the appropriate context).
  4. Going out with your friends.
  5. Staying home when everyone else wants to go out.
  6. Your lack of education.
  7. Your less-than-marketable graduate degree.
  8. Struggling financially.
  9. Being successful.
  10. Feeling how you feel.
  11. Stating your true feelings.
  12. Crying when you need to.
  13. Your penchant for the color purple.
  14. Your tiara.
  15. Your closet full of impractical shoes.
  16. The feather extension in your hair.
  17. Walking away from a job that makes you unhappy.
  18. Walking away from an abusive relationship.
  19. Doing your best in a relationship that didn’t make it anyway.
  20. Being single.
  21. Going to a restaurant and dining alone.
  22. Your tattoo.
  23. Your belly button ring.
  24. Taking risks.
  25. Telling the truth.
  26. Wearing your pajamas all day.
  27. Listening to 80’s rock.
  28. Watching a chick flick.
  29. Reading a romance novel.
  30. Avoiding people who have hurt you.
  31. Not being attracted to someone who is attracted to you.
  32. The extra ten pounds you are carrying around.
  33. Demanding respect.
  34. Not putting up with bad behavior from others.
  35. Having high standards when it comes to relationships.
  36. Being frugal.
  37. Treating yourself to something special.
  38. Not knowing how to do something.
  39. Being really good at something.
  40. Telling the truth.
  41. Refusing to compromise your integrity.
  42. Changing your mind.
  43. Resting when you are tired.
  44. Your crazy family.
  45. Being proud of your children.
  46. Helping others.
  47. Your faith.
Can you think of anything else?


Carol Burnside aka Annie Rayburn said...

Excellent list!

Amanda said...

Refusing to answer the door when they show up without calling.
Not being concerned with others opinion of yourself
Getting rude with someone that was rude first

Pam Asberry said...

Thanks, Carol! :-)

Pam Asberry said...

Good additions, Amanda. Thank you for stopping by and commenting!

Amanda said...


Pam Asberry said...

You are more than welcome!

Cindy Blyle said...

Oh Pam I so have one more to add to your list but I don't think anyone one else would understand or agree but perhaps you! FUN BLOG

Pam Asberry said...

Hey Cindy! I wish I knew what you are thinking about! Thank you for stopping by and commenting!

Julee J. Adams said...

Good for you! Glad I suggested your blog topic and you no longer need the button that says, "I'm Pam and I'm sorry." Because why should you apologize for something you have no control over or that is not wrong? Sure as h*ll shouldn't apologize over your tiara...just sayin'. BTW, I was Queen of Everything for Halloween one year and I wore that bad girl proudly all day. Keep 'em coming, y'all.

Kathy said...

I've been starting to think along these lines, too! Glad you posted this. I don't have a tiara, but I have six cats!

KendallGrey said...

Wow, this is an amazing list! I think you covered all the bases. Thanks for sharing. :-)

Denise said...

Love it. I'm sharing.

Pam Asberry said...

Actually, Julee, we developed our weekly blog topics months ago, but great minds think alike. :-) We intend to keep 'em coming - big, bad girls that we are! ;-)

Pam Asberry said...

Perfect, Kathy! :-)

Pam Asberry said...

You're welcome, Kendall. No. Apologies. :-)

Pam Asberry said...

Glad you love it, Denise. And thanks for sharing!

S.M. Carrière said...

J'Adore this! Numbers 30 and 31 especially.
I have one that I do often:
Showing up to events in themed costume!

Lindy said...

Nope. You nailed it!

Amanda said...

I almost apologized for something that was completely beyond my control today. Then I remembered something a psych professor told us about patients."If you apologize for something you accept blame not just in your mind but in their minds. When that happens everything else becomes your problem too because you told them they could blame you.

Pam Asberry said...

I love it, S.M.! I think I should invest in a great costume or two! :-)

Pam Asberry said...

Thanks, Lindy! It was fun writing this list. I am still coming up with things to add. But I liked the number 47, LOL!

Pam Asberry said...

That is so true, Amanda - made worse by the fact that many people have a hard time accepting responsibility for their own behavior. When we apologize for things that aren't our fault, we make it way too easy for them!

Megan said...

I AM PRINTING THIS!!! And I will not apologize for stating that in all caps.

Amen for number 42. :)

Pam Asberry said...

Thanks, Megan. And I won't apologize for using exclamation points! I LOVE exclamation points! Caps, too, apparently...

SAIDFRAZ said...

Love your list, I think I might borrow a few and start my own list!

Pam Asberry said...

Go for it, Sherri! :-)

pat said...

Numbers 41 + 17

Jen Talty said...

I apologize and take the blame for other people's mistakes...all the time.

Eleanor Gwyn - Jones said...

As a Brit, I have been conditioned to apologise (with an 's'--though I won't apologise for that) all the time.
Yesterday's examples are: saying sorry because I was more dressed up than my casually-attired friends, although no dress code had been discussed; and apologising for the flight that I booked (for all of us)being delayed. Also, I realise I say this when people tell me they are ill. I will make a conscious effort to stop, it's exhausting to be sorry all the time.

Eleanor Gwyn - Jones said...

Also having dessert. I like dessert. I wish meals could start with it. I will stop apologising for wanting it when others at the table can't or won't eat it.

Pam Asberry said...

I'm sorry, Pat. :-(

Pam Asberry said...

Stop it, Jen. Just. Stop. It. (((hugs)))

Pam Asberry said...

It's so easy to fall into those habits, Eleanor. Often we don't even realize what we're doing. But now that you know you can take action. NEVER apologize for having dessert. That one definitely should be on the list! Thank you for stopping by and commenting!

Tami Brothers said...

Awesome list, Pam! You go girl!!!

I hate to admit it but I am guilty of more things on this list than I care to admit to. I promise to TRY to move away from that way of thinking as much as I can. Baby steps. :)

LOVE that picture. You are HOT!!!


Pam Asberry said...

It is so easy to fall into the habit of saying "I'm sorry," Tami. But baby steps will get you where you want to go. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other! As for the picture, that was a fun night! ;-)